Why you Cant
by XKittyclawX
Summary: SaiNaru Sai just wants to make Naruto happy, he offers to become his boyfriend after uncovering his secret. Naruto says no. He decides to show Naruto what a good boyfriend he can be. Naruto begs him not to but Sai has a mission.
1. Chapter 1: Example A

**Authors Note:**Hey guys I decided to do a story on the side other then Along came a spider. I hope you guys like this one its different but I had fun typing it lol

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto!**

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Why You Cant

Chapter one: Example A

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Naruto growled "Stop touching me!"

"Let me see." Sai smiled, obviously fake.

"Shut up and get the hell away from me" He pulled the curtain around him, somehow Sai found his way into his bathroom right before he was going to shower and wasn't leaving till he saw Narutos seal.

"It's for my drawing." He stated trying to pry the curtan away from him

"What the hell do you need to draw my seal for?"

"Im drawing a portrait of you, and it wont be right if I don't see it." He said entering the shower "Just a peak."

"Get the fuck out pervert!... an what the hell do you need to see my seal for to draw a portrait?" He twisted himself in the curtain so his head was one of the only thing popping out.

"Its a nude portaite."

"GET THE FUCK OUT NOW!" Naruto screamed at him, there was sound of the curtain hooks snapping causing him and Sai both to fall on the tile floor "Get off!" He tried to push him but his hands were wrapped with curtain.

"Hold on Naruto." Sai pull out a kunine knife

"What are you doing... hey!" Sai cut the curtain to his stomach away.

"I see."

"Sai Im going to fuck'n kill you, get off!" He struggled against the curtain in vein. Sai's eyes traveled lower.

"...a proper look." Naruto headbutted him stunning him long enough to toss him off, he stood up the curtain falling off of him and Sai got a front view. He examined him for a second

"Smaller than I remembered."

"GET OUT" Naruto grabbed the curtain covering himself. Sai bowed and took off out of the bathroom leaving Naruto feeling violated.

***

**Next Day**

***

Sai sat under a tree working on his sketch, Naruto and Sakura were heading around the corner, Sakura taking off ahead of Naruto.

"Hey Sai what are you drawing" She leaned over looking a his picture.

"Sakura Stop!" Naruto called to her before running towards them. But it was to late.

"It Naruto." He smiled, Sakura's mouth dropped, eyes like baseballs "Do you like it?" He asked her as if he didn't see her reaction. Naruto ran up to them snatching the photo away.

"It not normal to sit around drawing my fuck'n dick! Stop."

"I wasn't." Sai said matter of fact.

"You weren't..." He looked at the photo seeing indeed a naked sketch of him... but there was something... "Sai where's my dick?"

"It was so small I didn't draw it"

"..." He grabbed the collar of his shirt shaking him"You BASTARD!"

A feeling a great evil washed over them.

"You have defiled a woman's eyes" Sakura snarled her aura black.

"But I didn't draw his penis." He said confused.

There was two large whacks.

"...Sakura why'd you hit me too..."

***

**Afternoon**

***

Sai had been forced to draw Naruto a penis then tear his picture up. It was suppose to be a gift to him but he didn't like it.

"hm" He flipped through his book. 'The best way to make amends with a friend who is mad at you: Apologies with a gift' He nodded to the book closing it and taking off down to the stores.

***

**One Hour later**

***

"Naruto, Sakura" They both looked up confused standing and sitting beside the bridge. They were all supposed to meet Kakashi there.

"Sai your late" Naruto said obviously still pissed about earlier

"What is it?" Sakura asked politely smiling seeing Sai was had something to say.

" I have gotten you both a gift... to apologies" He held out two wrapped boxes. Sakura took hers first, Naruto took his a little slower not sure what to expect.

"Thank you" She bowed. Naruto grunted. Sakura opened her box, smiling she pulled out a expansive perfume "Thank you very much Sai! This is to much"

Sai smiled then looked at Naruto who had a brand new attitude. He nearly tore though the box.

"Oi" Kakashi appeared from above. Naruto pulled out his gift looking excited.

"..."

"Im glad you like it Naruto" Sai said smiling "I thought since you were so mad about not having one earlier Id give you one... The girl said it will please you, I even had her put your name on the side, she said she knew who you were."

Naruto looked at the dildo he was holding to shocked to say anything. He looked at the name imprinted Uzamaki Naruto.

"...Naruto, please.... " Kakashi sweat drop.

***

**Sai's house - Night time**

***

Sai sighed, he wasn't sure why Naruto was always mad at him. He tried and tried but he couldn't please him. He scanned his book looking for any advice. What was he doing wrong. He dropped the book and headed to Narutos house.

He knocked on the door but when Naruto opened it, he closed it again.

"Naruto I came to apologise" He called out.

Naruto opened the door looking mad "Go away" He shut it.

"I brought ramen." Naruto opened the door and Sai held up a special package.

"...fine." He let him in closing the door behind him.

There was a huge mess in his house and Sai walked over empty packages paper and clothes. Naruto grabbed the ramen from him. He took off to the stove pulling a pot out.

"You have a lot of stuff Naruto" he started helping him clean of the table. Naruto grunted as he finished filling the pot with water "Whats this?" Sai looked at a magazine from the table. Naruto turned looking over his shoulder. He blushed walking towards him stumbling over his stuff.

"Dont touch other peoples stuff bastard!" he snatched the magazine from his hand.

"Naruto... Are you gay?"

"Shut up, not so loud" He covered his mouth.

Sai looked at him, he was beat red. He smiled removing Narutos hand from his mouth kissing it lightly.

"Are you lonely?"

"What? I'm not lonely!" He fumed. Sai wrapped an arm around his waist placing a hand on his cheek.

"So you just beat off to these magazines alone but your not lonely" He smiled backing him up against the table "...I found the perfect gift" He moved his hand from his lower back to Narutos rear squeezing it.

"Argh GET off!" He pushed him away "What are you doing"

"I only want to help..." He said calmly moving forward toward him again.

"Will you stop you only do that with someone you care about!" He shouted beat red.

"I care about you"

"No there's a process!" He pushed him away again

Sai's eyebrows knitted together "So the guys in that magazine fulfilled this process?"

"well no... that different" He armed himself with a backscratcher.

"...Okay, whats the process" He asked taking a seat.

Naruto blushed stilled aiming the backscratcher at him "It doesn't matter"

"Why not?"

"Because"

"...Because?"

"Its called dating and no you'd make a bad boyfriend."

"How do you know that?"

"How about today for example!" Sai thought it over, he still didn't know what he did wrong.

"Okay, Ill improve." He said standing up moving toward him. Naruto backed away begging him not to.

"Oh god please no, you've done enough." He grabbed the dildo he got earlier "This is enough really"

"Ill prove I can be a good boyfriend" Sai grabbed the magazine "Then we have sex." Naruto hit him

"_THATS NOT HOW IT WORKS_!"

**Push this Button lol**


	2. Chapter 2: Examble B

**Authors Note: **Hey thank you guys for the reviews! Im so glad you liked it, Sai is funny lol I drew a blank on what I was going to write but then said forget it, have fun with it lol

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto!**

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Chapter 2: Example B

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Sai's finger tips ran across the book covers, he stopped at a book that caught his attention 'Building to a Relationship:Step by step'

He grabbed the book walking to a small desk. He sat down flipping the book open and looked at the index '... its best to start where we are'

_More than Friends: Get to know them on a more personal level._

He leaned back in his chair reading the chapter intensely.

***

**Later that day**

***

Naruto closed the bathroom door behind him sighing. He grabbed the milk that was on his table finishing off what was left then throwing it away.

He made his way to his bedroom, looked up and Sai waved slightly to him

" Naruto." Then proceded to go through his draws. Pulling out boxers with foxes on them.

"What the hell are you doing in my house!" He ran to his dresser slamming the draw shut "How'd do you keep getting in!"

Sai smiled at him like he was retarded "The window."

"Why the fuck are you here!? This is breaking and entering!" He tried glaring holes in him to resit punching him through the wall.

"Im trying to find out more about you." he stated opening the draw again.

"the only thing your going to find in here is my boxers, pervert" he closed it once more, then looked at Sai's hands taking the boxers he was still holding away

"...not really you have more magaz-"

"Get out!"

"But-"

"OUT"

"..." Sai stared at him for a moment the started to head for the door "Naruto"

"What" He snapped.

"Can I have your number."

"NO!"

***

**Afternoon**

***

Naruto peeked his head around the corner 'No Sai' He proceed with caution into the Ichiraku ramen shop.

He sighed taking a seat, 'I know he isn't going to let this go' He asked the owner for bowl.

"This ones paid for," The old man nodded to Sai who was a couple chairs away... and making his way over.

"What a good friend" Naruto laughed nevously to the shop keeper.

Sai put his arm around Naruto's waist burying his chin in his neck. Naruto chocked going stiff with shock.

The old man coughed in his hands which sounded a lot like laughing as he turned around to continue making food.

"No its not what it seems" Anime tears fell as he reach out toward the old man who waved him off "...Sai... I'm going to kill you." he growled.

"What did I do?" He asked sincerely.

"Get off!" He pushed him away, grabbing his bowl he turned his back toward Sai eating his noddels angry.

Sai sat in the chair beside him sighing.

"..." Naruto looked at him then turned back to his food "... hey thanks" He grumbled.

"... no problem" he nodded.

Naruto sighed turning back forward

"Excuse me sir, Ill take your special" Sai told the shopkeeper.

Naruto tried not to get annoyed with the fact that he got a regular bowl and Sai was getting a special.

After all should he be complaining after getting a free bowl.

"Oh and another for Naruto hes almost done" Sai smiled at Naruto, getting the same in return 'hes not _so_bad' Naruto said to himself thoughtfully.

Sai pulled out a card.

Naruto glared daggers into Sai.

"_THATS MY CARD_!"

" I didn't think you'd mind."

***

**Next Day**

***

"Naruto just hear me out" he tried to show him the book.

"Go away" He moaned.

"..."

"Argh What do you want?!"

"A blow job is not sex"

"...Ill come back" Kakashi backed away having appeared out of no where.

Naruto punched Sai

***

**Library**

***

Sai sat in the library studying his book intensely 'I guess I shouldn't have skipped chapters, why was he so mad' Sai closed his book.

"Sai" Sakura waved to him.

"Sakura." He nodded

"Oh wow, what happen to your eye"

"..."

"What are you reading this time" She smiled dropping the subject and taking a seat on the other side of the table. She examined the cover "Relationships...step by step, Sai did your crush punch you..." 'Though I'd probably understand why'

"Yes unfourchenitly, it not going so good ... Sakura can I ask you for advise" He stratched his cheek nervously.

Sakura smiled teeth sparkling like Lee's "I was wondering if you'd ask, but if its ino-pig Ill deck your other eye"

"...No"

"Okay then"

***

**Evening**

***

"Naruto" Sai pulled out the dress

Naruto walked away.

***

**Libaray**

***

"WHAT? Didn't like it?!" Sakura slammed her fist on the desk breaking it "I hand picked that! No fashion sense at all!"

"No none" He thought it over.

"you shouldn't agree with me Sai it's rude" She gave him a disapproving look.

"..." Sai frowned 'this is confusing'

"Well I guess not every girl is into that sorta thing"

"well about that..."

***

**Sai's house - Night time**

***

Three large banging sounds came from Sai's doorway. He look up then back at his book "Coming"

He continued reading his book and went to answer his door.

There was another three large banging sounds but before he could answer it the door broke off falling on top of him, an increase in weight kept him from getting up.

"Naruto, not that its not nice to see you... but your crushing me"

"I'm going to fuck you up." Naruto growled from on top of the door red chakara glowed around his body.

"Already, but thats not till another five chapters"

The door grew heavier.

"Okay... But my penis doesn't work if-"

"_STOP SAYING THAT WORD_"

"You hurting me."

**Push the button lol**


	3. Chapter 3: Examble C

**Authors Note: **Thank you guys again for reviewing again! Im so glad you guys like it :) Im having fun writing this, I hope I keep making you guys happy.

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto!**

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Chapter 3

Example C

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"I'm really sorry Sai" Sakura continued working on his shoulder " I couldn't help it, I had to tell some one"

"..."

"I didn't think it would spread around... or at least not that quick" She laughed nervously.

"..."

"Well why the hell didn't you fight back?!" She punched his still injured shoulder, making him wince "sorry"

"I can't" Sai flipped open his book thumbing a few pages and flashed it to her.

Sakura ribbed the book from his hands "This book isn't helping... none of the books you read really help now that I think about it" She tore the book through the middle.

"...That was the library's."

"Shut up" She grabbed him by the under arm "You need to figure this out on your own... were going to the mall"

"Didn't you say on my own."

She blew him off pulling out her phone " I'm also going to get Hintana and Ino to help Hintana was a little depressed but I'm sure shes fine now"

"..."

"Come on... What is it" she asked letting go of his arm

"Can you finish healing me first... I cant feel leg

***

**Mall**

***

Sai sat out side the dressing rooms, surround by many bags that were not his

'How did this happen' He thought alittle confused.

"Oi, look who it is" Kiba and Shino walked up to him.

"Kiba-kun Shino-kun" He nodded to them.

"Don't be like that you can call me Kiba, were friends after all" He smiled showing his fangs.

Sai thought over this new discovery.

Kiba squatted on the ground beside Sai looking up at him "I heard Naruto was finally pushed out of the closet... I already knew about you though, no offense"

"Its none of our buisness Kiba" Shino told him from behind his jacket.

"I believe I can help you"

"Stay out of it" Shino warned again being ignored

"I heard Naruto's not to happy about coming out"

"He punched you after you asked, don't lie." Shino stated in a low voice barley audible behind Kiba's.

"let me help you" Kiba told him with a toothy grin.

"Leave it alone" Shino tried again

"ignore him... I bet your wondering why I'm being such a nice guy" Kiba laughed stuffing his hands in his pockets picking himself up "Well its like this, Naruto used be like my little brother, but now he's my little sister..." He laughed at his own joke.

"I understand" Sai said taking it seriously.

"I think my little sisters making a mistake about you" Kiba looked down at him "and you need a males advice, cause he's not going to be impressed by dresses and jewelery" He pointed to the bags that surrounded him "Shino and me"

"I refuse." Shino walked away.

"Okay _I _will help you" He place his hand on top of Sais head.

***

**Outside Arcade**

***

"Remember everything?" Sai nodded slightly

"Good" Kiba said putting his newly bought sunglasses on "...Go" he push him inside the building.

He watched Sai looked back at him then worked his way to the machine Naruto was playing, he looked over again to him again.

Kiba waved his hand for him to keep going.

Sai turned back around following Kibas steps.

"..."

'That doesn't look like it was going good' Kiba felt his sweat drop.

He back away from the window he was looking through.

Turned and bump into Shino

"..."

"Your taking responsibility."

***

**Afternoon**

***

"Why are you so down comrade!" Lee appeared hitting him on his back "Things not working out"

"No... it seems he's getting violent."

"I understand" Lee nodded "What you need is to confess your love!"

"Ive done that."

"Not the right way, it needs to be clear, dramatic, in front of everyone!" He told him clutching his heart " let me give you my assistance friend." Lee grinned giving him a thumbs up his teeth sparkling

***

**One hour later**

***

"Im sorry friend I have failed you" Lee was on his knees "I will a-tone for my mistake" Lee got up and took off full speed down the street.

Sai watched the dust cloud disappeared

"Sai." Shikamaru and Chouji appeared

"Man you look like youve been eating to much" Chouji remarked at his slightly swelled face.

"Shikamaru, may I ask a favor of you" Sai smiled knowing he was the smartest person in the village.

"Eh... is this about Naruto?" Sai nodded "I can come up with over 100 strategies but I don't see you succeeding one"

"..."

"...troublesome"

***

**Evening**

***

"Sai I heard-..." Ino stopped

"..." Sai stared a her, there was a moment of silence shared between them.

"Sakura should-"

"Yes Im trying to find her."

"Ill help you" Ino grabbed his arm "But first."

"I dont think it such a good idea... He's getting really mad"

"You owe us for ditching out, besides what doesn't kill you makes you stronger"

"What if it kills me."

She ignored him.

***

**One hour later**

***

"I'm so sorry Sai" Ino bowed "I swear, It sounded... well, alot better when I said it"

"Yes, that seems to happen often."

"I'm going to look for Sakura" She told him running off.

It was almost night time when Ino came running back with Sakura

"You look like shit" She told him grabbing his arm "Sai you need to deck Naruto really good, I think he's losing respect for you. Your coming off as a push over."

"A push over?" He asked her

"Yeah, he's walking all over you" She told him wrapping his arm "...An I know your being a nice guy but, theres a line"

"...Sakura"

"...yeah?"

...Can I have my book back."

"...yeah"

***

**Going home**

***

"Naruto what are you doing here" Sai asked seeing him on a bench.

"Hey... Im sorry about today, everyone told me whats been going on" He moved over to let Sai sit down.

"I'm sorry if I cause you trouble" Sai took a seat next to him.

"Well... I guess it feels kind of nice being chased after for once"

"But... it seems I wont make a very good one"

"...not really" Naruto nodded in agreement

Sai sighed.

"... are you finally going to give up" Naruto laughed making Sai look up at him.

"...no"

"... I think... I was alittle wrong about you" He smiled gently at him. Sai stared "...Im sorry... Sai"

"...No problem" He smiled back.

Sai put his arm around him.

Naruto stiffened but didn't push him away.

He knew he shouldn't joke with Sai but he felt like teasing him. He could just push him away after.

"Sai you sitting so close" His smile turned into a smirk "I'm losing respect for you"

Sai punched him

**Push the button lol**


	4. Chapter 4: Example D

**Authors Note: **Elloo again, Ive like no idea where Im going with this after I finished the end. But ah well I didn't know where I was going through any of this lol thanks for stickin with me so far though lol

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto!**

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Chapter 3

Example D

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Sakura growled trying to wrap Naruto's hand but he was moving around so much.

"and then 5 jounin came out of no where-" Naruto shouted to to Kiba who looked at him sceptically.

Sakura hit him "Be still!"

"...Sakura-chan..." he rubbed his head

"...One punch did this" Sakura asked him.

"Eh, where you not listening!"

She growled again making him cringe "I told him too."

"...What the hell, why'd you do that" His cheeks turned red.

"Because he looked like tusande punching bag"

"How the hell was I suppose to know you guys thought up all that bullshit, He almost molested me on the starship game cause Kiba's a fucktard. He announce to the entire village 'while' insulting my penis! We were going to make passionate love under the stars and he didn't care who watches... I was going to let that go till he started reasoning with himself on why they shouldn't at least pay... "

"Sai broke your hand!" Kiba said laughing in the back.

"Shut up, Or ill break your right hand!" He yelled at him turning even redder.

"Well... that's not the point" Sakura told him "I know Ino couldn't have-"

"Fuck Ino."

Kiba laughed harder.

"...I only told him to hit you not break bones" she defended herself.

"Well he didn't break my hand... but it was his fault" He said his mouth making a pout.

"Then how'd you break it?" She asked him

"Well thanks to you Sai learned the art of ducking..." He turned away from her a little embarrassed. "I hit a tree"

"... your an idiot" Kiba laughed wheezing a little to catch his breath.

"Fuck you"

"...Well what did you do"

"I don't know I thought he was possessed or in some jutsu"

"God you are both so irritating" She sighed.

***

**Libaray**

***

She hit him over the head "So your saying he was flirting with you and you decked him"

"... flirting?"

Ino sat beside him moving uncomfortably close " Sai I'm losing respect for you" She grabbed his hand putting it over her shoulder "your line is 'well then please don't respect me' and you move in!" She said nose to nose with him.

Sai smiled "...Ino... your making me sick." commenting on her closeness.

"Why you-"

"Anyways" Sakura grabbed him by his back colar pulling him up away from her "Forget what Ino just said, no more books or advice in fact your going to shut up completely" she made one last sign and grabbed his jaw.

"What are you doing." Ino asked taken back.

"When you cant say anything right, dont say anything at all" She let him go "How do you feel" she asked him.

"..." his mouth moved but nothing came out.

"perfect"

"Forehead this is a stupid idea"

" Shut it Ino-pig" She smiled at Sai "Sai, we have a date to get ready for" Sai looked up at her

"Your saying Naruto agree to that?" Ino asked a little doubtful.

"Yes if he ever wanted his ramen stash back... So Sai do you feel up to it" She smiled not receiving an answer "...perfect"

***

**Date**

***

"..."

"..." Naruto stared at him from across the table

"So what will you be having" A woman asked them holding a pen and paper up.

"Ill take the number four"

"..." Sai held three fingers up

"You want that well done, or medium rare"

"..."

"sir"

"..." Sai smiled nervously mouthing well done.

"... um well done" He shook his head.

"Ill be right back" She told them walking off.

"..."

"..." Naruto bite the side of his cheek.

"..."

"well can you at least talk to me" Naruto turned his head away from him "...I mean this is what you wanted"

"..."

"your the one who's been trying to go out with me you know!...not that were going out." He glared at him.

"..."

"whatever... you didn't think it was going to be that easy to get in my pants did you?" He joked.

"..." Sai shook his head no 'Of course he knew it wasn't going to be easy' would have been his response.

"... Well then say something!"

"..."

"...hello" He shook his hand in front of him.

"..."

"Is that really the only reason" He asked his face turning red.

"..." Sai tried to shake his head no but Naruto wasn't settling for anything but words.

"... your an asshole Sai!" Naruto got up but Sai grabbed his hand. He tapped his throat trying to tell him about the jutsu.

"No I wont blow you!" He pulled his hand away

"..." 'why does this happen to him?' Sai tried to tell him to wait but couldn't, he got up to go after him but the waitress grabbed his shirt.

"Look the foods already made I need to get paid"

***

**Thirty minutes later**

***

Sai looked around the corner, 'there he is'

He tried calling out to him "..." nothing came out. He decided to approach him anyways.

"Go away"

'not that again' Sai grabbed his hand trying to explain.

"Go away!" He struggled but Sai wasn't going to let go, not without a fight.

"I hate you idiot"

Sai's hand let lose enough for him to make his escape.

He stood there dumb struck. The three words rumbled around in his head opening his mind up like a book reading the definition.

Hate: extreme dislike or antipathy.

Naruto didn't like him.

Naruto dislike him.

...Naruto hated him.

"..."

***

**Library**

***

"Wait... Sai, Ill fix it Ill tell him" She hid behind the bookcase ducking down waiting for it to crash down on her 'This is the first time Ive seen Sai look so mad'

Sai grabbed a book from the shelf, her face being reveled from the other side "...fix... now" Came two words barely audible from his mouth but with such venom it made her flinch.

"Well look I have a mission right n-"

Sai put the book back, and walked out of the library.

'Hes snapped' she pulled out her phone dialing it.

***

**Naruto House**

***

There were three large bangs on his door. Naruto looked over his shoulder then back to his pot of ramen "coming" he yawned.

The door came crashing in. Ink flying everywhere.

"Argh look at my floor" He yelled stepping over his trash pointing at more trash.

"Got damnit whats your-" His lips still moved but he couldn't talk.

There was a mouth blocking his words, and no words could describe how pissed he was.

But he didn't pull away.

**Push the button lol**


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